the road most traveled by

i must make reference back to this post. it is the kicker for where i am right now. i am not dedicated. i've fallen and can't get up. here i am boldly stating my purpose in life by being a seeker of happiness and i am far from being in that state right now. i love the savior. i do. he carefully places things (read people) in my path to help me along the way. 

i realize i have moments of depression. i get the winter blues as well but thats a cop-out. an easy excuse to be readily made. what it comes down to, i'm rebelling. i realize why the road is narrow, it's hard to stay on if you don't watch your footing. if i don't do what i need to do to choose the things that help me, how can i help me? why is it that when one knows better they still make the wrong choice? maybe i need to learn this. i am a girl from the school of hard knocks after all.

if you have the time or the inclination to stay with me, you'll find out what happens when someone does make better choices. i like that girl. she's happier. she grows and learns better. i want to know her again.

James says no-no

Life

We all know how life gets busy, gets ahead of us, time slips away, too much to do and how many other ways/excuses we have. I know them all. It's when you hear something that you've heard before but need to be reminded of, that you remember how each moment in our lives is precious and fleeting. I end this with the words of the wise turtle from Kung Fu Panda.

"Yesterday is history, the future is a mystery. Today is a gift. That is why we call it the present."

For all of those who fret over what was and what is and aren't connected with today, it's nice to be reminded to slow down. Breathe. Love. Love a little more. Smile at someone. Be grateful for what you have. I write this for me. For the one person I knows who needs to be reminded. Anyone else who gains anything from it is a bonus.

Committed

How committed to Christ am I?

I'll get back to this.

Thoughts that go through your head while you are in a cycling class at about 40 minutes into a class.

r.i.p.

rest in peace mantis

life did not last long for you

enjoy fields of gold

pray mantis

i found a pray mantis outside today and the girls were intrigued by it. it was a little scary at first. 

i will admit i was a little creeped out by it but then i held him. 

nicole's friend got a little courage and wanted to hold him. all things look fine in this

picture but she jumped back about two feet when his spikey legs inched closer to her. so ended said bravery. 

then the girls proceeded to argue. he likes me. no, he like me. no, he likes me better. no he likes ME better and so forth and so forth the conversation went. 

nicole asked if she could touch it. it jumped at her. then ended the love affair. they no longer wanted anything to do with it. 

his little alien head kept looking around at us. i think he was as interested in us as we were him. thanks little mantis!

Danielle

The kids got their picture packs back a week or so ago and Danielle says, "Mom, my teeth really stick out." The pose is cute, she has a cute smile, her hair looks great and sure enough the lighting created a HUGE shadow from her teeth casting onto her lip. So I say the positives about it and inside I'm sad because I don't want her feeling badly about herself. George comes home that night and I tell him that the pictures came back and are cute and tell him about the shadow on her teeth and how maybe we should get them retaken. Later on, George says that I probably made Danielle feel bad by what I said and so then I worry. I always worry about her teeth, hence why we started Orthodontics so early on and it is one of those things I just don't want kids being mean to her about. I pull her aside and say "Danielle, did I make you feel bad about your school picture? Are you unhappy about it and should we get them retaken?" She shrugs her shoulders and then says, "I'm okay with it mom. I've learned to love myself. Kinda like Penelope who loved herself even with her pig nose." Oh my gosh. Did she just say that to me? She loves herself for who she is even though she has a really big overbite and kids (and adults) say things about it? I can't say I ever loved myself like that at nine years old but then again, she is a good girl and I love her.